The Show, The Party, The After-party

Before Friday April 24th, 2015.

I was a 32-year-old mother of 2.  I worked 8-5 in logistics and customer service.  I had a boyfriend that I adored.  I was happy, I was having fun.  I was just living a normal life…

On Friday April 24, 2015.

I remember it being a long, long, stressful day.  I cannot, however, remember why.  I left work at 5pm.  My son (Mars, 4 years old) was picked up from daycare by his father.  I picked up my daughter (Terryn, 9 years old) from after care.  We went straight home.  We had to have been home maybe 30 minutes.  I remember being overwhelmingly sleepy.  I remember texting my BF to come home, that I didn’t feel like going to dinner after all. I laid across the bed and closed my eyes, I thought.  I awoke to my daughter at the foot of my bed  in tears.  I asked her what was wrong.  She said there was something wrong with me,  that my eyes were open and there was “stuff” coming out of my mouth.  I told her that I was fine, that I was tired, really tired.  When I look back on this memory it’s tunnel vision, it’s very blurry.  I remember him walking in the room, saying “let’s go to the hospital.”  I remember declining.  There is one or two 1 second flashes of memory after that and then nothing until I woke up in the hospital on Saturday morning.

That evening I would assume that I had 3-5 seizures before arriving at the emergency room.  I was told of my being unconscious, and of a point “at which I became violent” (running joke) in emergency.  I was blessed enough to have made it home safe with my baby girl; to have started seizing in the comfort of my own bed; to have a daughter smart enough to call my BF in this emergency; to have a BF that saves my life.  I feel like I woke up knowing that I was hospitalized and waiting on answers as to why, which is very weird to me.  I remember seeing my mother, who lives 2 hours away and asking her who drove her here and falling back asleep.  I remember waking up and that handsome man of mine leaning in and saying to me “they found a lesion on your brain baby.  You have to decide whether to have it surgically removed or do chemo and radiation.”  I remember saying without hesitation “remove it.”

Two weeks later I had my right temporal craniotomy.  I was never in fear of the surgery.  I know now that the surgery was the easy part.  Recovery from surgery has been smoother than expected.  Waiting for my tumor diagnosis was easy as well because I knew it was benign… right up until I couldn’t get that information over the phone.  That is the point where my gears began to turn.

May 29th, 2015

My follow-up appointment, I’ll never for get it “It looks like cancer.”  Aggressive.  Grade 4.  GBM.  Stay optimistic.  Pray.

After May 29th, 2015

We fight.  Like “This is Sparta!” fight.  Period.

 

2 thoughts on “The Show, The Party, The After-party

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